So there I was....

... making a total arse of myself.

To be fair, it wasn't my fault. It's because of this school's ridiculous computers, Adobe Illustrator and Mark Renaud. They, combined, have decided to torture me with this dumb logo design project.

I'm currently at school fighting my way through the incomprehensible mess that is Illustrator. It doesnt help that the computers don't actually have enough ram to save things properly. and it doesnt help that it's due in two days and I am irritated as all hell.

back to me making an arse of me (which is all you guys really want to hear about). So I burst in to the student association office in a rampant rage to vent to Rhonda, who I knew would understand. Much yelling, cursing and gesticulating ensued. And then more yelling. Unfortunatly, everyone else in the room had no idea what I was talking about. So I just looked like another computer illiterate fool ranting about how the "computer screwed them over" when everybody knows it's just them not knowing anything about computers.

BUT THIS WAS NOT THE CASE!!! IT ISNT MY FAULT!!!!

I admit that my ineptness with Illustrator is my own fault (I kind of avoided the lectures because I didn't understand anything. I hear this doesn't help the learning process...). However, the fact that the computer wont save things properly is deirectly related to the fact that this school is out of it's mind. They proudly installed all the newest versions of Illustrator and Photoshop on their archaic computers. So yes, it IS nice to have the newsest versions. But you know what would be even nicer? Computers with AT LEAST the minimum requirements to run them. Guess what?!? WE DONT HAVE THEM. SO leave us with the older versions, thank you very much, and we'll make due.

MORONS!!!!


GAH!!!!


I WANT TO GO BACK TO PHOTOSHOP! Don't WANT to learn new things....


*pants*

Okay, I think I'm done. I should make use of my last hour here before going to Pub night. I shall dance away my sorrows.

In other news, that boy makes me happy as a clam.

(And I want inspiration. I want to create.)

ENLIGHT

Did emily just accidentally sleep for about 11 straight hours?

I think she did.

My throat also feels like like there is a small animal living in it. No more all-nighters.



...

OKay, so no more SCHOOL-related all nighters.

she made it.

I survived my first successful all night work-a-thon. The only thing that was brutal was the buses. they are like my kryptonite... As soon as I sit in one I fall asleep.

anyways, I just wanted to point out that as of today I no longer have to hand in a single damn thing for two of my 5 classes.

Is that sweet or what?

*blushes like a school girl*

okay, I couldnt resist, I found two more great paintings by him.



and:

I Heart David B. Milne

Im on break.

I have an oral presentation on David Milne tomorrow at 3. I had done very little to prepare from it other than read what I consider is close to two whole books devoted to him. I am currently trying to compose an interesting and balanced presentation on the guy.

I had never heard of Milne before I chose to do this project on him. I must say that I have fallen completly in love with his artwork and his philosophy on artwork. He didnt want to make big statements on life or society, he was trying to simplify art. He reduced paintings to line and colour. The result is often, for me, is wonder at the time it would take to simplify things to the point of istant legibility but still have them detailed and thoughtful. All he wanted from other artists was creativity.

heh. sorry to go off like that, but all I've been reading for the past week is stuff about 'creative courage' and 'dazzle spots' and other mumbo jumbo like that. That and it's 3 am and Im on my second wonderful cafeinated drink. I found some sort of homemade cappuccino mix in our cupboard that we got from my aunt a few years back and my poor sleep depraved self is running off of all the wonderful goodness two of those babies can provide me.

oh! guess what! I have class at 8 tomorrow morning. I considered skipping then thought.... what the hell, I can do it. This means that there isn't really a point to me sleeping.... sooo... Emily's first all-nighter before school! I've only ever attempted this one and I made it until 4am before my back gave out. but this time around my back feels just spiff. so yeah.

Tomorrow's oral should go interestingly.

I leave you with an absolutly wonderful David Milne quote:

Art has no objective, and objective is fixed, known beforehand. Art works toward the unknown. That is why is is living not static

oh, and you get one of my favorite Milne paintings:

celebrate.

I officially no longer work at GPC. While I haven't shown up there or talked to them in months, I only just received that little paper thingy that says you don't work at a place anymore.

I figured this was worth celebrating.
Emily treats self to wine and a night of not studying (ignoring her test the following day).

In two weeks time I will be done with all things Quebec art and all ridiculously huge assignments will be out of the way. At that point I will cut loose and do something crazy. I don't know what yet, it may involve booze, but... damn it better be good.

Maybe I'll throw a party... anyone want to come?

of mostly shit days.

I say mostly because there are no absolutes. But overall, today did not feel good.

I woke up tired depsite enough sleep, felt completly unsociable in class and sat on my own with headphones avoiding talking to people. Nothing about my art girls, it was just one of those days. I am quite pleased with the way my project is going. Even better is that Linda seems to be as well.

I almost cried at least 3 times throughout the day for no apparent reason. I also almost had some sort of minor panic attack at the thought of my Quebec Art test on Wednesday. In fact when I think about it now, my throat tightens up and my eyes water. I'm not sure Ive ever been so nervous about a test before. The worst part is that I don't really need to do well, as long as I pass, I'll be fine. Most art schools just look at portfolios and are content to know you passed all oyur classes. Im almost convinced that I will pass this test. But I want more than that. I don't know why either. I'm emotionally involved with my marks this semester. I want to ace this test. I know I don't need to and that I probably won't but I wouldnt be satisfied with just a pass.

I got an 81 on my Self Portrait in Virtual Studio. I spent a ridiculous amount of time on that thing. I didn't leave it to the last minute and I worked hard on it. Mark even seemed to like it. But 81? Thats the BEST I could do? It seems no matter how hard I work on something, I just get the same mark. Anywhere in the 80s.

I'm completly serious. Now that I actually think about it... I can't think of a single peice of artwork that has gotten outside of the 80s... (Quebec Art I got a bit lower, but Im talking about artwork) In fact, if you look at my mid term marks, excusing Quebec Art, I got 85% in every single class. Exactly.

I feel like a complete idiot ranting about what, even in my books, are good grades. I just hate the idea of stagnating. I want to improve. Last year Brendan ranted to me about how once Linda gave you a grade, you were stuck with basically the same grade all year. At the time I thought he was full of shit and really, I still do. But I can't help but feel like it doesnt matter what I do, I'm a mid-80s student. period.

And none of this changes the fact that in 2 days I have a test worth 40% of my mark and a week after that an oral worth another 40% of the same mark (which I havent even looked at) and that I'm scared as hell about them.

you know... all I wanted to do today was be able to talk for more than 30minutes to Emma. And telling him I couldn't just made me even more furstrated.

Soccer practice, for once though, wasnt horrible. I didn't play like complete shit and someone actually talked to me. It was kind of a surprise.

I need to go study and pretend like I have a chance of doing well.

Im am sincerely sorry about this ridiculously depressing post.

Round Two

I think Im slightly tired so Im going to just do the summary of the day:

metro tickets used: 0
Buses taken: 1
Beers drank: 0
Hukka's smoked: 1
money spent: approx 30$
hours spent studying for quebec art: 1
new people met: 3
hours slept last night: 7.5 (but it was interrupted)
number of red pepper's bought: 3
sketches drawn so far on the entire trip: 3 decent ones.
number of seats sat in during a single play: 2

time: almost 1.

fading fast.

Round one

the problem with most discussions is that they arent arguments, they're debates. People are emotionally involved and don't want to be wrongand therefore only listen to what the other person says in terms of what can be used to contradict them. I enjoy listenning to people talk. I like finding the spots where the contradict themselves and considering the theory that I had previously discarded. I like seeing the pros and cons of both sides. I don't like to chose sides, I guess I just like to hear the ideas.

I love it when the discussion becomes dynamic, give and take. My problem is that Im not vocal enough so the rare times where I actually have a point, I don't really have the oppertunity for it. So I just stick with listenning and trying to not forget every interresting thing I hear.


Montreal head count:

Metros tickets used: 2
Beers drunk: 2
money spent: 57$ (including bus tickets)
hours spent on studying for quebec art: .5
new people met: 4

time: 2 am. no sleep.

Let the good times roll.

of...well... my life I guess.

Life goes on as always, the cycle continues.

I have a huge Quebec art test next week. And by huge I mean I have to memorise about 115 slides (name of artwork, slide and 3 relevant informations), the whole thing being worth 40 % of my term mark. The being pain in the ass of it all? Out of those 115, she'll only be asking for 10 of them.

But you know, in light of this I decided, what the heck, lets go to Montreal. *shrugs*

I was feeling very mellow tonight. I listenned to every Beatles song on my computer and enjoyed it immensely. My plan however was to head to bed when they were done but now... now Bebel Gilberto is playing... and I like her too.
I tried making a cd... It didnt work

I go to bed defeated then...

Safe Haven

Well... I made it safe and sound.

They already did the upstairs so Im hiding up there now.

Yeah, I first found out about the SUPER SUCK invasion (yeah, all the tubes and hoses are hooked up to this big red box inside the back of some truck (the "HIGH POWERED vacuum truck". I kid you not, thats what it says on the side) currently parked in our driveway. The big red box is labled with large yellow letters SUPER SUCK. I though this was mildly entertaining.) at about 8:45 this morning when they knocked on the door and started talking loudly in their important man voices with my mother in the front hall.

side story: For some reason we seem to, every few months, have a crew of about 2 or 3 loud french men show up at our house in some sort of utility vehicle and perform some sort of maintanance on our home. Things like... cleaning the carpet or the couch, figuring out why sympatico sucks ass, building a freaking kitchen. Anyways, my point is they all use this loud, abrupt, important sounding man voice that can be heard all over the house. It's very unsettling to have strange men walking around your house period, let alone talking like this. It does not make things easier that they always seem to show up in the morning, when I'm still wandering around the house half asleep and still in my pyjamas.

Back to my original story... SO my mother walks into my room (lucky for her I was awake and reading) and tells me to clear up my room since they'll be up to clean the vents shortly. I stare at her in disbelief. The reason for this disbelief would become evident if you happen to SEE the condition of my room. It's a tad messy, to understate things. so... I shoved a few things in my closet, piled some more against my dresser, made my bed (I can't remember the last time I did that...) and fashioned some sort of path from the door to the vent. I felt my duty there was done.


Okay, some terrible smell is now taking over my house.... GAH! it's tuesday! MY DAY OFF! Not the day for people kicking me out of bed to clean my room OR having people hooking up the SUPER SUCK to my vents OR to make my house stinky!!!!

bah. I'll survive right? yeah. Thats right.In other news I've spent too much time having fun and ... you know... NOT doing homework lately, so now I have a shitload of work to do. Congrats Emily, you have now proven that people can, in fact, learn absolutly nothing at all from past experiences! sigh... I'll figure it out. I always do.

In other news, we went to The Works last night as part of my mother's "screw Halloween" resolution. I love that place. I mean, where else can you get a hamburger topped with avocado, tomato, garlic and shrimp? The anwser is: nowhere. That combined with the sweet potatoe fries means I never have to eat again.

whats that, friday off? whats that, party?

Okay, off to "create" for the day.

drawing for homework? Long weekend? Sometimes I just love my life.

Fugitized

My house is being overrun by men toting large tubes that resemble giant vacuum cleaners. They are cleaning our vents apparently.... From my perspective,they are making LOTS of noise(ie. GIANT VACUUM CLEANERS, it kind of sounds like the air ducts are maddly shaking inside the walls, kind of like if there were a gazillion monkeys in them jumping around frantically), letting cold air in (doors are open), and chasing me out of every room I try to hide in (as it turns out, we have vents in every frickin single room in the house). I'm currently seeking refuge in my basement, mistakenly thinking that there are no vents down here. Not so I now realise. I saw one of the guys poke his head in here a few minutes ago, I think they might commence invasion (with large plastic tubes in tow) any minute now. I suppose there's the off chance that they already did this room. *crosses fingers*

oh god... they're here.