somethings are beautiful and some things are not.

coffee shop was awesome.

the guitar is a beautiful instrument and it did not bother me to listen to it again and again. (see *a guide to emily -a list of things im a sucker for*). then the laughing... oh the laughing. kurt, abe... you guys rock my world. tom... not so much.


i got to sketch alot. most of the sketches do no look like who they should. my consolation is that my models were always moving and i only have about 5 minutes to do each. oh well, i can only get better, right?

eeek... i will pay for the night of fun with the hours and hours of homework i have tomorrow. the pain, the pain.

speaking of pain... when does it stop being worth it? im not talking about life. for me, life will always be worth while there still is blue skies on a fall afternoon and fireplaces on cold winter night and rooftops on sunny summer days. little bit of a tangent there... my point is... there's a breaking point for everyone. eventually you snap and spew a little. have you ever convinced yourself that you dont need the approval of others, and that you in fact, enjoy alienating them? I have. but then ill have one of those nights and feel terribly out of place and feel pretty damn crappy as a result. and if you thought about it, the events taking place around you would normally make you happy but not today, today you care about what the people think. and then... you pull in and go back to being invisible. the default setting is always simply. not always interesting but not alienating. push that button and go splat said the tiger.


there is one thing in the world i think almost every person i have ever met is guitly of. music-ism. that is, judging others on their taste in music. i do it too even though i try not to, a popular one to bite into is what is commonly reffered to as 'emo'. now i will be the first to admit that there is little point to emo. truth is, i dont really care. i cant hear the lyrics anyways, i just like the way it sounds. does it make me a bad person because i listen to pointless music? i like to think not. does it make person x a bad person because they wear the "emo paraphanalia'?i doubt it. just like does it mean that the girl who listens to hip hop is materialistic, of make the rapper guy dumber, or make the one with the well rounded tastes a well rounded, good person? no. it does not. music doesnt make a person. people listen to whatever makes them happiest and has nothing to do with how good of a person they are. i cannot stand it when people point out someone wearing a certain style associated with a certain type of music and proceed to mock them because of said style or said taste in music. it doesnt make sense. its music, not personality. if you listen to a certain type of music than i do or listen to a wider variaty than i do, it doesnt make you better, it just makes you a different person. and we all know how much we all hate individuality.... either way, its all just another way to ego-stroke ourselves.


anywho, thats just a pet peeve among others.



well... its bed time for the ole emster.

sometime the human race just boggles my mind.