take a look.

first, id like to direct you to viki's blog

in it, you will see a picture.yes, that is me sitting there. when i see that picture, im reminded of the day she took it. i remember the whole bloody thing and how many times i wanted to either cry or kill someone. i remember ther hurt and the anger. and yes, like the title said, sometimes you DO just want to cry. the point is that that is not a happy picture. and viki knew it. and she still does. she looked at that picture and saw it all right away. i dont know what other people see in it. but im guessing no one saw it as well as viki.

i remember a few years back when everyone had that special someone. not the person they could kiss and call their own. no, i mean the person that shares all their most intimate secrets and who just KNEW them. thats all i wanted back then, someone who could look at me and right away know that i was upset and be able to form a good guess at why. and thats why i love viki the way i do and why she IS my best friend, because she knows me and she knows how to help me. and when life comes down on her in ways she is no where close to deserving, i just want to help. i want to make it all better. but see, i have this problem. im not a people person. and along with the fact that i am not dependent on people in general is the fact that i dont know how to talk away peoples' problems. i just really want to give back to people who have given so much to me. so i do my best and just listen even when i know it isnt enough.

anyways, i would like to tell everyone reading this to just take a look. instead of seeing whats on the surface and judging, just take a look.
its not hard, all you have to do is look.